We, as parents always feel proud of our ways of parenting and think that we are doing a great job. We take a lot of pride in thinking that our children need us in every step for our guidance and trust. We fell as great sense of joy and pride when our children look up to us to lead them in every step of their life.
Are we doing the right things as parents? When we sit back and think about it, then the question arises in our mind that whether they are responsible, independent enough to tackle the pressure of our society. We have to teach them the survival strategies to face the complex world which is interdependent, so that they can survive without the help of their parents.
Some parents always expect their children to turn out well in all spheres of life and so they put excessive pressure on their children. Rarely, the children do well, instead these children rebel, resist, act out, get depressed and become very arrogant. Now these are the parents who guide their children occasionally and they think of themselves as a successful parent when their children become a grown, independent adult with a self esteem.
You as a parent should never use the word, “should” or “must” or “ought” quite frequently to your child because this will show your child that you as a parent know what the best is for your child. The child will know that his or her decisions, judgments are not taken into account. Guidance by you, as a parent is only to be given when it is requested by your child.
Stop being the judge of your child’s actions. Let the child learn from the mistakes of his or her life and do not let them fall back to you every time there is a problem which they might just face. You have to be humble even if you are with your child. Let your child know that even parents can make mistakes. Give them your support to find out the answers to the problem by themselves. Your child may listen to you and might jst confirm to all your rules and this just might even be out of fear but then this way they will learn to become independent.
